I absolutely throw in the towel on my haplessly misunderstood personality. No matter how I sugarcoat things, no matter how polite and sincerely nice I am – I am the Boogie Man to many. I hear words like “Oh she frightens me” or “Oh I’m scared of her”, and the latest just pushed me into acceptance. Fine. You want scary? I’ll be your effing Boogie Man.
In talking via email with a new male co-worker at another facility, he reminded me that he used to work at a sister company on the East Coast. We briefly spoke about the people we knew and he mentioned a gal I dealt with. The backstory on her was that she was kind of new, but super-efficient, and really brought this place up to par. I loved dealing with her and I made sure more on more than one occassion that her management knew what a wonderful job I felt she was doing. I wanted accolades thrown her way, because I was thrilled at how she made my job just that much easier.
He told me she was terrified of me.
I don’t mean a little, I mean she would defy New Jersey Union Dock Workers to get what I needed for her, for fear of me. To say I was stunned would be to put it mildly. I made sure we were talking about the same person. How was this possible? I never uttered a single word to her that was the least bit stunted, angry, or rude. Yet somehow, she still saw, read or heard – the Boogie Man in me.
This makes me feel like I am Shrek in lipstick. Sully in a dress. The Boogie Man in perfume & high heels. Very nice high heels, but high heels never the less. I want to scream, “But I am a shy delicate flower DAMNIT!”
I don’t get it completely. I mean, I know people who are like this. The ones that you fear dealing with, and I really don’t feel like I fit into that category. I’m never a bully. I would sooner eat peed on grass than purposely hurt someone. I take the underdog under my wing, even at times to my detriment. I’ll accept that my sense of humour is biting and dark. And at times I can be a tad blunt. — Stop laughing – OK, to truthfully examine myself I’d have to say that once in a blue moon my need to rush thru life, causes me to step on toes. Ok, maybe more than once in a blue moon there. I’ll tie that to my lack of patience for stupidity, but really does that make me so damn terrifying?
When KC and the Sunshine Band sing of the Boogie Man, he is a romantic dancing fool, who will do whatever it takes to win the girl over, be it early morning, or late afternoon. When they finally make a song about me (and I have faith they will), something tells me that’s not quite the approach that will be taken.